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Anonymous
Hey I am on Medial • 1d
Been feeling completely stuck lately — mentally, professionally, in every way. It feels like I’m not learning anything new, not growing, and honestly, even the thought of applying somewhere builds up anxiety now. Earlier, I had patience — I kept telling myself that it’ll take time, things will eventually fall into place. But that patience is running thin now. Every small thing — whether it’s trying to prep, apply, or even sticking to a basic routine — feels exhausting. I’m not someone who usually compares myself to others. But these days, it’s hard not to. Seeing juniors get placed, people finding direction, hearing about PPOs — it hits differently now. No matter how much I try to avoid that mindset, it creeps in. It’s been almost a year now since graduation — completely out of that phase. Neither in college anymore, nor properly settled into anything. And that space in between? Honestly, it drains you. Maybe part of it was because I had a soft commitment from one of the companies for a PPO. Somewhere deep down, I pinned my hopes on that and didn’t look around seriously enough. Looking back, that feels like a mistake — but at this point, there’s no point dwelling on it. All of this has taken a mental toll. My routine is all over the place, stress levels are high, and career uncertainty has started affecting every part of life. I had considered internships or short-term roles, but even that feels late now. And there’s always that fear — what if I get something but can’t convert it into a full-time offer? It feels like that would just pull me further down. Masters, MBA — doesn’t feel right at this point. I don’t want to jump into something just to escape this feeling of being stuck. Feels like most people around me have found some direction, some clarity. I haven’t. And that uncertainty? That weighs heavy.
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